I was 21 years old when I walked down the aisle.
I met Brad when I was 18, started dating him at 19 and was engaged to be married to him at 21…………….10 months after we got engaged I became Mrs. Phillips and 1 week later I turned 22.
Taylor Swift’s 22 looks nothing like my 22. š
During our 10 month engagement I was slammed in the face with lots of marital advice and was given a fair share of “you’re too young” “are you sure about this?” “how can you know at 21 that this is who you should spend the rest of your life with?” pre-wedding talks.
I wish I had kept a tally of the number of times someone asked me if I was pregnant. I wasn’t. But lots of people thought for sure that the only reason a girl my age would get married was if she was expecting a baby.
Looking back now, I get it in a way……..21 is young to get married by today’s standards. I had just graduated from college, and yes, in a lot of ways I was just a baby. At 21 I hadn’t dated too many different guys, and I still had a lot of maturing to do.
But I wasn’t too young to get married. I’ve never been more sure of any decision in life I’ve ever made. I feel blessed that I met the person I want to spend the rest of my life with at such a young age.
I remember people saying to me “I hope you don’t look back and regret that you missed out on your fun, single girl years.”
Fourteen years later I can honestly say “No, I’ve never felt like I missed out on a single thing!”
Not every love story reads like Sex and The City.
At 21 I knew exactly what love was really all about……….I knew it wasn’t all rainbows and butterflies………….I was, after all, a shipwreck survivor, so I knew exactly what I was signing up for. I was nervous, excited and terrified all at the same time.
Tears ran down my face as my dad walked me down the aisle. It was the end of a chapter and the beginning of a new one. I could barely speak my vows over my tears. I knew exactly what I was saying and what I was vowing to do. And I didn’t say those words out loud in front of God and my family and friends flippantly.
My definition of love hasn’t changed since my senior year of high school when I learned about what love really means from Mr. Sherrod (my high school Bible teacher). His definition became my definition, and it’s not failed me yet. I still believe that love is a verb…….it’s an action word……it’s not a noun……it’s not a place you can fall in and out of……it’s something you choose to do every day. And whether or not you choose to make that decision at 21 or 31 has no bearing on the success of your marriage. Only you can know if you’re ready to make that decision.
Fourteen years later I’d still rather argue with this guy than make love to anyone else. He makes life an adventure!
Cheers to choosing to love each other every day!
Beautifully said Carmel! Happy Anniversary to you two love birds. I was a young bride too at age 23. I don't regret it for a second.